Happy 5th Explantversary to Me! It’s hard to believe it’s been five years since I got those toxic breast implants taken out.

Honestly speaking, this is the hardest season I have ever walked through.  Some parts of my life I hold private. Currently,  I almost have no words. I’ve been sitting in some deep grief and doing my best to process the pain with God.

I try to set aside one day a week as a grieving day. During the summer I like to do that at the beach, but during the school year I like to go to Makerspace and create. Today I made this sticker to help me remember my journey through breast implant illness, and to encourage myself.

I don’t want to be afraid to say yes to new adventures with God just because of the disheartening season I’m in right now.  So today I spent time thinking about God’s faithfulness. He always comes through for me, but sometimes (probably every-time) I wrestle with trusting Him.

A few years ago we went up to Starved Rock to celebrate our Wedding Anniversary. During that trip the hotel elevator malfunctioned while we were going up. The elevator got stuck between floors and we couldn’t get out.  The fire department had to come with a giant set of keys to unlock the door and bring us back down to the level we belonged on.

That was a breakthrough day for our family. The cost of the trip had exceeded my husband’s budget and with the weight of each expense his enthusiasm waned.

Everything shifted when we got stuck in that elevator.  The hotel manager was so horrified that she waved all the charges for our stay. My husband said that God worked a miracle for him. In a matter of a moment there was an unexpected plot twist.

This morning I was reminded of a keychain I have that says, “Good Morning this is GOD. I WILL be HANDLING ALL YOUR Problems today.”
God doesn’t have any problems. He’s not worried at all! I love Corrie ten Boom’s word on this subject. “There is no panic in Heaven! God has no problems, only plans.”

So today on my 5th Explantversary I am remembering how God had a plan to help me get my implants out. It was a long journey and very refining. At times along the way, my faith failed, and that is good for me to remember. It seems that struggle is part of the process.

God shows up for me when I need Him.  He does it in His time, in His way. He is the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow. And He has a plan for every day of my life!